Tuesday, May 29, 2012

:(

Is it okay to use a sad face for a title post?  I've noticed this past week or so my emotions seem to be right at the surface.  I am weepy about so many things.  It finally dawned on me...although we so delight in watching the harvest crews head down south and then seeing combines moving in the field right here in Kansas, it sure brings a sense of sadness upon me.  I don't think I feel the sting of missing my Grandpa and Jereme's dad more so than when the combines are rolling in the field.  So much loss is wrapped up in the death of those two men.  We miss them so much and we miss them so much for our boys.  Both came from a long line of family farms.  With their deaths, so came the separation from the family farm to someone else farming/renting the family farm.  It's difficult to explain but for those that have experienced this loss no explanation is needed.  It's weird how one moment we are excitedly pointing out to our boys the harvest crews and then in the very next moment, Jereme and I will look at each other trying to hold back our tears.  Makes me think of Amy Grant's song:
"We pour out our miseries,
God just hears a melody
Beautiful, the mess we are
the honest cries of breaking hearts
are better than a hallelujah."




Jereme checking Grandpa's wheat just 6 short weeks after he died


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