I'm sorry, God

I really don't set out in the mornings to desecrate holy places. Apparently, it just happens, at least in our family. But, what's a girl to do when she is 35/36 weeks pregnant, has just strapped both boys in their car seats and is clear on the other side of the building when one of those little boys urgently grabs himself and says, "mommy, potty!" Do I unstrap both and hoof it back to the building and into a restroom? Yes, probably most of you are nodding your head wondering as if there is another option. By the way, "that building" just happens to be our church.

So, being the improviser that I am, I get Isaac out of his seat and try to discreetly place him by the car to pee. ***Oh and yes, he knows how to pee standing up now, which he ironically learned to do at the drag races last weekend when he had no shoes, no shirt and no underwear on...just trying to set the stage for our family having slight leanings towards being rednecks.*** And, boy oh boy, did he need to go! It apparently was an emergency.

Does it make it any better that we were technically standing off the church property on the curb?

And, would it help if I also told you that he is an excellent shot at peeing standing up and also peed a little bit in the minivan? (That kind of made me giggle a little, though...you know how I love that car!)

Warning: Picture overload

I haven't uploaded pics since JUNE!?!?! Our lives are consumed right now with consistency on potty-training and getting ready for #3. They boys have done A-W-E-S-O-M-E on potty-training and I would say they are about 90-95% there. I wish I could say we are about 90-95% ready for this new baby to arrive!!

Before I put the pics on, I just gotta share with you some things I never dreamed in my life I would be saying. But, I have a sneaking suspicion that with boys in this house, this will only be the beginning of weird (and gross!) things I have to say out loud:

*Push your penis down. Hey, momma said push your penis down when you potty; you're peeing everywhere!!
*Big boys have to wear pants when they're outside.
*Yes, Bonner (our dog) has a penis. Yes, daddy has a penis. Pull your pants back up, NOW. Yes, Poppa also has a penis.
*DO NOT touch your bottom while you are pooping. STOP, get your hand out of there.
*Get your foot out of the toliet.

Ah, seriously, we live a glamarous life!!!

Water time!




I love my clothesline!! Big shout out to Poppa Gary for getting that up for us!


Yes, yes we are raising rocket scientists as a matter of fact. Who doesn't want to wear a stocking hat when it is 105 degrees outside?



Out at Monsanto's (daddy's!) big corn/soybean plot!
Showing DEKALB corn a little love!




Now, be honest, brother, don't you think the Asgrow beans look the best?



Now, let me tell you about the 64-79 variety...







Checking out how the corn compares to the competitors. Do we really need to tell you whose looks the best??




We love the giraffes at the zoo!

1 week later...

Still on hiatus, but I do have about 95 pictures to upload from the past month. Potty-training going well...not completely there but they are doing excellent. Momma has only cried twice, I think.

Now, for the important stuff. Seriously, Half-Blood Prince opens here on Weds which JUST happens to be our 9th anniversary. Now, do you think I can come up with a stinkin' baby-sitter that day, yet? Of course not, but I am determined as it will either be Jereme and I at the movies together on our anniversary or it will be Jereme at home with his boys and me at the theater for our annivesary. This Muggle has been WAITING forever for it to open!!!

I must be insane...

Blogging hiatus right now b/c apparently I've lost my mind. I am potty-training the boys at 33 weeks pregnant. For the record, I offered any amount of money to most people I know to do this for me but there were ZERO takers. Nothing like a huge-o pregnant lady doing the "Pee-pee in the potty dance" 23 times per day.

Why, why, why???

Why do I continue to go to Walmart? Short of hoping to entertain all 3 readers of my blog, I just don't know. I would try to tell you some of the "legitimate" reasons why I was there today but, let's just be honest. 8 months of pregnancy makes me a wee bit on the lazy side. So, in an attempt to not make 4 different stops today, I chose the big W.

Really, I thought the trip was going relatively well. Everyone I saw had on bras, I only heard a few not-so-offensive swear words and only one creepy couple (think 15- year-old girl repeatedly kissing a somewhere around 50-year-old man).

I surveyed my cart. Groceries? Check. Spackling? Check. Shampoo? Check. Curtains? Check. Needle and spool of thread? No. I head back to that department. I wander aimlessly for a few moments with no luck. Find associate. Ask where I can find a package of needles and thread. She smiles and says we don't have any. I laugh and say, no really, where are they? She repeats they have not one package of needles or any spools of thread. I ask how that is possible. She calls for asst. manager (I must be marked as "troublemaker" for their store). He arrives on scene and I say, "seriously, I just need one needle, one spool of any color thread, or hell, even an emergency sewing kit will work at this point?" He assures me with a big smile that they hope in a few weeks they will be restocked with those items but at this time, they don't have any of the above.

Ok, so, here's the deal, people. You can choose from a) one of probably 35 varieties of condoms, b) pick up your own beer-making kit or c) purchase one of 12,874 DVDs at your local Walmart. But, under no circumstances should a person expect to be able to purchase the often-sought, rarely-found package of needles or spool of thread. I'm just sayin'.

Wheat harvest and fishing...

I just love my boys! It doesn't get much better than daddy and his boys spending the day together doing "boy" things. On top of what you see in the pics, they found snakes, held kittens, jumped on the trampoline, swam and so much more!! I love having boys and I won't lie to you, there is a little pitter-patter of excitement in me thinking about just a short time ahead of us when daddy can go do these things with "just" his boys!!

Apology

To my neighbors:

I know this is just one thing on a list of many that we probably need to apologize to you about. I never dreamt I'd be a big, ol' pregnant gal running around in nothing but a tank top with not even a bra on underneath, for crying out loud. You'll just have to suffer through the next 75 days with me. I'll suffer through chasing 2 toddler boys in the heat of Kansas summer and well, you'll just have to suffer through watching me do it in a not-very-flattering-yet-keeps-me-somewhat-cool tank top.